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My Life with Multiple Sclerosis!

Life with Multiple Sclerosis


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2006 November 18 : Getting around to posting about me...

I've put off posting about myself. Probably because it's quite depressing to think of it. Well I was diagnosed with MS last month (I forget the date) and the numbness in my left hand (pinky and half of ring finger, Ulnar nerve) is not gone. It hurts quite bad. My eyes come and go but still aren't back to normal yet.

The bruises of the Solu-Medrol I was on finally went away. I gained almost 30 lbs from the treatment which now I have to fight all over again to get back to being thin and sexy... ok.. just thin..

Today my new girlfriend and I are sitting at her friend's house in Oaklahoma City. They are watching the Ohio/Michigan football game and I'm sitting here writing out this message in my blog.

A little history of what's going on with me...

About 7 years ago (~2002) my left side, from the mid-chest down, developed a hypersensitivity to cold. After endless MRI's and such, they said I had Transverse Myelitis. Learned to live with it and was getting very close to not noticing it at all.

Earlier this year, it moved to my right side. And then shortly after, both Ulnar nerves got FUBARed somehow. My right hand I can feel again but my left pinky is totally useless. I've even thought of cutting it off sometimes since it hurts so much and yet is totally numb.

I was down to 225 lbs after my divorce, looking quite good. I'm 6'4". I had a very ugly and nasty divorce from an awful unfaithful and disrespecting woman. Looking back, I really wonder why I married her in the first place. I knew she was unfaithful... I've actually been alone for a very long time...

Anyhow, I met a new, very wonderful woman. Who treats me nice and respects me (At least so far...) We have been dating since the summer and I'm shopping for a ring. I know she's a keeper because when the MS blew up in my face and messed up my life, she stuck around, even when I told her to go. So unlike so many other people. Half of my friends are no longer talking to me over my condition. I will say this: You learn who your true friends are when the real $#!% hits the fan.

Hell, part of me still wants her to move on and find someone not 'screwed up' like me but she refuses to go. Which is good because I love her more than life itself. I honestly think without her I might not have made it this far...

Back to the condition... MS sucks.. it sucks eggs.. big.. hairy ostrich eggs... And hearing the Dr. say "I can't do anything for ya..." over and over doesn't help... Makes you slightly.... PISSED... to say the least. Hell it took me over a month to start posting in my blog...

Anyhow, my condition so far includes:

Biggest thing in the bunch; the weight gain from using the Solu-Medrol which didn't help me a darn little bit... I was on 1 gram per day IV for 5 days... I might as well have been shooting water for all the good it did. And the side-effects suck horribly... I doubt I'll ever do it again.

New daily treatment; I've been considering Rebif but have not had the chance to start it yet. My insurance looks like it wont cover the $25k/year fee for it and my ex-wife cleaned me out when she left so I have nothing. She sold my stocks so I can't even sell those to cover the bill. At this point, I'm looking for handouts... But it looks like the new insurance I get next year might help some...

I'll do my best to keep this blog up to date at least once a week... Thanks for reading...
Posted by: SirGCal Comment

2006 November 01 : Just an FYI About this blog;

I leave this blog alone after posting because I want my attitude and thoughts to remain when I re-read them. Some of them are harsh, like I used to be. Especially the ones referring to my ex-wife.

But basically, the story of this blog is simply my life in process. I'm working to become a better person. Right all of the wrongs in my life. Actually, today most people regard me as one of the most honest, kindest and loyal people they know. That wasn't always the case.

Some people bring out the worst in me (Ex-wife). Some people bring out the best (Wife, old high-school friends I'm reconnecting with, etc.). But I make this blog on the fly, and leave it so that I can read it again and remember.

Also in this blog will be reviews of things I have or have used, stuff I've done, etc. outside of the normal life updates.

I hope you enjoy them. I hope the bad ones don't give you a bad opinion of me. I am so much different than my old days. Unfortunately it took life threatening conditions to turn me around, but at least now I am turned around.
Posted by: SirGCal Comment